vegetation ~

This one is a must in my week, and I hope even in the midst of the varying dynamics of all the families; there is room for you to appropriate this simplification!!!! It is about rest!!!! Sweet rest!!!! We all need it more than we realize or ever allow ourselves, but it is such a necessity, and can relieve stress in more ways than we can ever understand.

Years ago, I realized that I was frustrated that I never read a good novel, or flipped through a fashion magazine, or saw that Oprah that everyone was talking about and to this day I still don’t know who Dr. McDreamy is, and I don't know one name of a real house wife. BUT…in the midst of that frustration I realized that I had no one to blame but myself…I could try to blame the role of motherhood, or wife-life, but then I began thinking…If I am going to be a professional at this family-thing, then I need to understand that professionals allow themselves time off, they take a lunch, an off-period, a sabbatical or even a vacation to recoup and resettle in order to be more effective at their profession. In the same vein, I need to allow myself the same much needed breaks that others allow themselves in whatever form they can be found.

Sooooo….I decided that in order to feel like I can flip through the pages of a fashion magazine, pick up that novel and wipe off the dust, or even sit and watch that decorating show, I was going to have to plan for it! It would NOT just happen throughout the week or weave in and out of my day…NOOOO Rest was only going to come without much work to get it (kind of an oxymoron). But I was determined to find some peace and “down time” in my busy day/week/life!

I took my calendar and looked for free spaces and noticed that Friday afternoons were pretty free…I usually had a play group in the morning, but then my daughter took a nap and I usually filled my time with fiddling around the house. Aha! I could make that my “down time.” Time when I get a to just veg!!!!!! I decided to commit that space of time to guilt free vegging!!! My daughter would be asleep, and I could watch T.V., read a book or a magazine, surf the internet, download songs from itunes, you name it….I gave myself the rule that as long as it was not "family work" I was free to do it!!!

At first it was difficult to stick too. I would see the dishes or the unfolded clothes, or the pile of mail, but I would think to myself, “later”. And, eventually it worked…I did read books, flip through magazines, watch shows I had Tivo’d, and sometimes all at the same time…then before I knew it, it was time to get my son from school….and back to work I went!

Maybe you take your time one night a week after the kids are asleep or maybe one morning early before they awake…or maybe in the afternoons or maybe an hour every Saturday morning…just try your best to find your space in the week to rest and rejuvenate and think about something other then the unwashed baseball jersey, the “N” on you daughter’s report card or the starfish costume you have to finish by Friday.

DISCLAIMER #1 – I realize that every family is different and those differences may not allow for a couple of hours a week to get alone or take a long break, but the point is to work within the unique dynamics of your particular family and find even an hour or so every week to get to relax…alone….if your family situation allows you more than that then take it. Take it and own it and make it your “guilt free down time.” If you are the really laid back type that does not even need to assign your self time to take a break, then more power to you, but if you are like me, then you might need schedule it into your week!

DISCLAIMER #2 – This down time is not to suggest that it is the only time you get to just rest and hang out with your family, and your husbands in the evenings and on weekends etc….it is more about finding a time for you alone!!! Time to do some of those things that you just never seem to be able to fit in…the book, the magazine, the bon bons…who knows….maybe someday, I will discover who Dr. McDreamy is!